Perfect Imperfections

This is a very personal subject for me, one that I never intended to discuss or disclose publicly, not because I'm ashamed in any way, because at the end of the day it's my business. However, as it has to do with my body and has been mentioned in a few reviews I feel it is best to clear the air, and touch on the question of vulnerability. 

I have a minor physical disability. I sustained a prenatal stroke that caused the motor skills, muscle and coordination of my right side to be slightly impaired. Please understand if you haven't met me the effects are not terribly obvious, I am fully ambulatory and use no braces, walkers, or other aids to get around. Most people who casually meet me have no idea, I've even had friends not realize until I mention it. I have chosen to disclose it here because, while it does not limit or take away from my ability to have fully enjoyable intimate experiences, it is apparent in intimate settings. I have never had a client tell me that my physicality  in any way detracted from the quality of their experience with me, most do not even mention it. Likely all you will notice should you meet me is that my right hand is sometimes at an odd angle. 

The other reason I wanted to talk about this is I think there is a perception that providers are perfect little fantasies wrapped in silk lingerie. Even though we all know we are human, sometimes men who contact me act in awe of the persona I portray virtually. And of course, due to the nature of our work we have to put our best foot forward and present the most alluring versions of ourselves. However the beauty I have found in this work, as I have touched on previously, is the vulnerabilities I have been privileged to see from others, and how accepting them enriches their lives. I think that's a two way street and hope that, as is often the case with allowing oneself to be vulnerable, it opens me up to love and support. My other hope is instead of marring the image of the intellectual pin up girl it makes her three dimensional.

 

-Ava

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